HE and I went on a date this morning. Okay, we're pretty much gonna spend the day together. All of the "spiritual foreplay" of testifying to His perfection this week via this blog series had me yearning to be more intimate with Him. (Such an unexpected and beautiful benefit!) So, WE went to the beach. It seemed an appropriate place to be together, what with the bajillions of spiritual metaphors the ocean He made brings (My favorite this time was the way the waves would build up to something right before they had this mega impact on the water in front of it. Oh, how often I have seen my God do this very thing in life!) My Best Friend and I just got to sit and talk. I told Him about how much of a joy it is to be in love with Him, and He reminded me of Psalm 36:7-10: "How precious is your STEADFAST LOVE, O God! The children of mankind take refuge in the shadow of your wings. They feast on the ABUNDANCE of your house, and you give them drink from the river of your delights, For with you is the fountain of LIFE; in your light do we see LIGHT. Oh, continue your steadfast LOVE to those who know you, and your righteousness to the upright of heart!" (emphasis mine) The wave of this truth, the bottomless depths of it struck my heart with a kind of stunning profundity. It is in His Love that there is abundance and endless life and light. It cannot be found anywhere else because nothing else is the Source of all of those "things." If I can feast, there must be PLENTY to keep me full and satisfied. How could this not make me think of Psalm 34:8: "Oh, taste and see that the Lord is GOOD! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!" (emphasis mine) Yes, my Exceedingly Great Valentine: Empathizes. is Near & Outstanding. & his love is Unceasing. is Gentle & Handles everything. He is Enough, yes, more than enough. Nothing I desire can compare with Him, and rightly so because nothing else is ABLE to do what He can in a heart. Even withing a week of drawing near to Him. So, dear reader, and I earnestly hope, Lover of God, may today and everyday be one where He overwhelms You with His consistent, never-failing, intimate, kind, perfect, secure, incomparable merciful and gracious LOVE. Keep fixing your eyes on Him, ever removing any threat ("Those who pay regard to vain idols forsake their hope of steadfast love." Jonah 2:8) to closeness with your Tender and Outstanding Savior.
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When I would think through my list of "Things I Want in a Husband" in the past, there was one quality that never made an appearance. It wasn't that I didn't value It, or appreciate It when others demonstrated It to me; It was just not something I thought to be that crucial to marriage. I love my Dad, and I am so thankful that my God gave him to me to model aspects of godliness. But I don't think I saw this quality in him either (and he would likely agree that It is not typically used to describe him) , which may have been partially responsible for why I didn't see It for the treasure that It could be in a home environment. At least, not until God's perfect wisdom and plan moved me to San Diego. Here I have seen my mentor's husband, a sort of father-figure, display It bountifully, and now I feel so foolish that it has not been on the List all along. My Valentine is: 5. GENTLE He CALMS me and ASSUAGES my fears, eliminating them altogether. He reassures me that He is worthy of my trust and dependence because He CARES for me and CARRIES me, speaking to me with the SOOTHING Voice of the Word, inviting me, never forcing me, to rest in His arms. (Fascinating also is the fact that His Spirit produces fruit in me so that I too am somehow able to show off gentleness!) (Isaiah 40:11, 1 Peter 5:7, 1 John 4:18, Psalm 34:4) He is KIND. Such kindness leads me to repentance. He is patient towards me, knowing exactly how to bestow goodness upon me in such a way that I will be attracted and drawn to Him because there is so much safety in kindness. It is the kindness of my Savior Jesus Christ, who shed His blood for me, that holds back the wrath of God against sin. Indeed, what LOVING KINDNESS!! (Romans 2:4) (Psalm 18:35 in the ESV says, "Your gentleness made me great." The original Hebrew word and perhaps a better translation is Your condescension made me great. Christ's willingness to humble Himself by coming to earth so that I could one day be raised and ascend to be with Him makes Him enticingly appealing to my heart. Such a beautifully KIND act of love, wouldn't you say!?) Now that my God has reminded me of the delight that is His Kindness, I rest that regardless of my status, He will always have been and will be the most Kind God-Man to ever exist, the Lover of my Soul. Scattered. That's how I awoke this morning. It wasn't the kind where a jumbled mix of positive and negative thoughts duke it out to see who wins. It had more of a "lose-lose/catch-22" vibe going on as my heart and mind quickly jumped from fear of failure to shame and guilt to selfish, pitiable ideas, all of which "threatened to undo me," as the hymn writer once said. And all this before I had even put my feet on the floor. Time with Him felt like a chore this morning. I read the Word, attempted to organize the gibberish mush of my being into a journal, confessing navel-gazing pride while pleading with Him for reminders of the Life He brings. Knowing that this year would be full of change, I determined at the onset to store up the Word in my heart, meaning my quiet time now consists of intentional verse memorization of Psalm 119 (I know, tall order). Today was the first day of a new group of verses, and these two stuck out, "My soul clings to the dust; give me life according to your word!...My soul melts away for sorrow; strengthen me according to your word!" (v. 25, 28). Nothing could be closer a closer description of both my state and my supplication, and the irony of those words was not lost on me. In my flesh, I am all over the place. And so, the need for someone stable and unchanging is great. My Valentine's Love is: 4. UNCEASING His affection is CONSTANT. I might be frazzled, but He calmly whispers the sweet somethings that His Omniscience knows my heart requires. (He definitely did that this morning with 2 Timothy 2:19.) The love between us is IMPENETRABLE and UNBREAKABLE(Romans 8:38-39). I am His, blisters and all, and with such a deep and abiding friendship comes the abundant benefits of belonging to such a Lover. And yes, all for HIS Name's Sake. His RELENTLESS Love is true even on a day that starts off funky, with the foul stank of sin. For that same Love also delivers me from that which would threaten to keep us apart (Romans 5:8). Praise the Love Who has brought me everlasting rest, that I no longer have to wait for that kind of affection which this world could not satisfy anyway! If what I am looking for is Someone to deeply and sacrificially love me, even at my worst, then yes, once again, it is Jesus Christ who meets/exceeds such a standard. |
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